Giving Thanks

I have been Pondering lately about life and how funny it's twists and turns are. It is amazing to me just how much our attitudes effect all that goes on around us. I have come to realize as of late just how great life can be no matter what we are going through, if our attitude is good. Just the other day, I was really frustrated because I had a lot of homework to get done and the stress of all that has to be done was really getting to me at that particular moment, and the kids would not go to bed. It seemed like everyone had all these needs that had to all me met right then. I was so anxious for them to just get to bed, and I was crabby! I finally thought that I had them all to sleep and Mara woke up Emma with her crying. It was just the last straw. I got mad and used harsh words and unkind actions and swept her upstairs to my bed and said "don't get out again." When I went back down to do some more work, needless to say, I felt awful. I couldn't even concentrate on what I needed to do. I finally admitted that I was being a brat and went upstairs to apologize. She so willingly forgave me and said "will you say prayers with me." Make me feel like a louse. It is really hard to say prayers when you know that you are in the wrong and have hurt the feelings of one of Heavenly Father's sweet children. So in light of the fact that I had just been hurtful, I felt it really hard to then pray with Mara and ask for blessings that I didn't feel that I deserved, so I just gave thanks instead. My whole attitude of having too much to do, and feeling like I was in too deep, gave way to me seeing just how much I am able to accomplish with the help that he gives me. How grateful I am to know that when I do make a mistake I can always try harder and be forgiven as I am learning and growning. What a great time of year to focus on our blessings! And just how much we are watched over and protected and helped on our journey here. I just wanted to list a few of the most important things that I am thankful for. First, Family, what greater tool could we have been given to make it through this life than family? What a great plan that we get to be in a family to help lift us up when we fall, and to know us intimately, know our faults and struggles and still love us, to encourage us and help us endure those times that we don't think we can. I am so grateful to my little family, Ryan is so supportive of everything that I want to do. He is always so thoughtful to ask, "what do you need me to do tonight?" he is so helpful and willing to help with dinner or the kids when I am up to my eyballs in other things that need to be done. He is so understanding, and is such a good listening ear when I just need to "vent" I love him emincely. I truly love each one of my children. This morning we were saying prayers, and Max was still asleep and I just couldn't get over how much of a hole it left in our family to have just one missing. I don't know what I would do without each one of them. I am so grateful for our extended family as well. We are so lucky to have Ryan's great family, his parents are always willing to help us and are great to come and spoil the kids, and his siblings are such great people that I am lucky to get to call them in-laws. I so appreciate their friendship and their consideration with our family. My Parents are so great, and I realize that I am so much who I am because of them. How interesting it has been to me as I see my mom's family, all the cousins and their babies and families, and I see how much we look alike, and what traits and mannerism that we have that are similar. We truly are a product of our families. Next Nature, There is nothing like getting out in nature with my family to remind me of the simple pleasures of life. When we get to take time to be entertained by what was created for us, there is a quiet peace that comes, that doesn't come at any other time. I have been so grateful that since we have moved to Montana we have had so many more experiences with our kids that involve being outside, enjoying nature and working the land. There is a feeling of drawing closer to our creator that comes when we are out in nature that you can't get anywhere else, and I have loved being able to share that with our kids. And Lastly, Our Savior, where would I be without him? I am so grateful that he loved me enough to willingly, and that is the key, willingly sacrifice his life for me so that I can forever enjoy my family and live eternally with my Father in Heaven someday. I so look forward to the time when I will see Christ again, and pray that in all my struggles that I can endure to the end and live worthy to stand in his presence and feel of his love for all. I am so grateful for his example of christ-like love, and hope that I will more fully be able to have that for all men.